I'm a liar.
I slumped on the couch as I finally told myself the truth. I am a pathetic pathological liar, and its catching up with me. I lie about any and everything these days, and I can't seem to stop.
It actually started some years ago when I did something wrong and lied about it. Ever since, I haven't been able to stop lying. I lied when my beau first asked me out. I lied about a lot of things while getting to know him. I didn't think I was wrong initially, afterall I was only trying to elevate myself in d presence of a "big boy". His father was then, the Nigerian Ambassador to the United States of America. I, however am the daughter of two traders. It's not like my family was poverty striken, no we weren't. We had enough to eat and lived a fairly comfortable life. Even though my parents had to struggle to feed us and still give us (2 children) a good education, we were quite happy. At least we weren't begging, we would always say in a bid to be optimistic. I loved my life, and felt somewhat content with it, until I met Bidemi. Abidemi was every woman's dream, he was my dream come true. Initially, I didn't understand what the fuss was about in the girls hostel when he made an appearance but after see how amazing he looked, and heard of his wealthy background, I fell in love. I never tried to get his attention at first. This is a wealthy guy, he wouldn't even take notice of me. I was so sure he would only date models and "big girls".
On a faithful Friday that I will never forget even if I tried hard enough, I met him. I actually met THE Abidemi physically and he spoke to me. I was in the canteen, alone as usual when he came in with another friend of his. He was so polite, asked if they could share my table with me. Of course I could only say "yes", through the whole 2 minutes!. After about another 10 minutes, he asked my name- I was so scared, and told him the first attractive name that came to mind- Sharon. Sharon?! I am Omosalewa Adetoun. What the hell did I just do? I quickly shoved that thought aside as Bidemi commented on my name. "Beautiful name for a princess", he had said. We shared contacts, and I just couldn't believe my luck! The most sort after guy had just shown interest in me, or had he?. To say I was on the moon, would have been an understatement.
Three years later, we were together and going strong. By this time I had lied about my name, my family, my friends. In short, everything Bidemi knew about me had been a lie. I thought I was doing it for the greater good, if only I had known it would haunt me.
Bidemi took me home to his family. His father was now an Honourable Minister of the country. I was so excited! I could truly say he was in love with me, although not as much as I was smitten with him. I practically worshipped him!. Bidemi proposed to me at my graduation party. It was my every dream come true. Until, of course we started planning the wedding. I had lied that my parents lived in Mexico but had brought me to Nigeria to live with an aunt. And I had lied that my aunt's family was struggling because of her husband's pride to get help from my family. Bidemi was more than ready to go to Mexico just to meet my family, and invite them to our wedding. Bidemi's parents, although rich, were as cultured as anyone could be. They insisted that they had to meet my family first, as a means of introduction, before deciding on an actual date for our wedding. They too were either ready to go to Mexico, or await my parents arrival in Nigeria. I knew Bidemi loved me very much, and his mother adored me. What I didn't know was whether they both loved me for the person I am, or for the person I lied to be.
I have contemplated many things to get out of my predicament. Pray for a plane crash to occur and lie my parents were in the plane, or come clean and tell the only man I have ever loved that everything he thought he knew about me, was a lie! None seemed appealing to do. So, I'm starting to think I should just run away. Cut my losses, and go somewhere it's difficult to locate me. I'm thinking the north, or maybe the east. Wherever life takes me, I sincerely hope you find true happiness in the arms of a more deserving lady.
I am extremely sorry that I could only leave a letter to say goodbye, but do find it in your heart to forgive me. Believe me that I decided I had to save you from me. If I didn't leave, the lies would never stop. The bag delivered with this letter contains every gift you've ever given me, including my engagement ring.
I love you always...