Tuesday 26 September 2017

Turning Time #2

It seemed easy now right? Leave Otunba and get married to David. Things didn't work out that way. Infact, things got really messy fast. Otunba found out somehow about my second life, and he took matters into his own hands. All I got was an sms from David to end our year long relationship. Till this day, I don't know exactly what Otunba did or said to my true love.
Otunba warned me never to attempt such again, he said he forgave me for straying being a child and all. He then began controlling every aspect of my life from there on. He got me a job in his friend's company, got a 2 bedroom apartment for me in the same estate he lived, and funded my account on a monthly basis. In return, I had to do the duties of a wife without actually being a wife. I cooked his meal, washed his clothes, and satisfied him sexually. Although we lived apart, Otunba showed up unannounced at my doorstep atleast 4 times every week. I was truly comfortable, but unhappy. I had become a kept mistress, and it drove me nuts. Periodically, Otunba would send me costumes for those events he needed me to accompany him to. I was nothing more than a pretty face hanging on his arm, and being ogled by his friends. I still wonder exactly how I got myself into such arrangement. I had long distanced myself from family and friends to keep my shame to myself.

About 5years after the completion of my youth service, I finally got the only news that gave me hope. I was pregnant. Otunba took the news in a way I never dreamed he would. He asked, no- ordered me to get rid of it. His excuse being that "his wife" (who was supposedly dead) and children (when did 1 child become 4?) would never hear of it. He made it very clear that he had all he wanted, and didn't have room for another child.
This is how my nightmare started. The only reason I didn't hate myself so much during all these years of having an affair with a man old enough to be my father's elder brother, was because I atleast thought he was single. A widowed old man was much better than a married old man, wasn't it? As you must have guessed at this stage, Otunba lied to me. His wife was alive and well. The young lady he introduced to me as his only child was infact another mistress of his. I was crushed, alone and scared at the same time. I did the only thing I could think of, I went home to cry to my family. The family I had long neglected and severed ties with, welcomed me back and forgave me.

Otunba's wife picked that time to return to Nigeria to help her husband's political aspiration, and of course, heard about my affair with her husband. It was no secret amongst high societal gatherings that Otunba had a little girl who warmed his bed when the need arose. She (Otunba's wife) paid me a visit, saw my growing pregnancy bulge, and threatened to ruin my life if I continued seeing her husband. Only God knows how I managed to survive the remainder of my pregnancy term. I received all form of threats, in emails, phone calls, sms, and even to my face. I could barely go out, for fear of loosing my life. The threats were mostly directed at my unborn baby. Otunba did not even bother to see me anymore. He focussed solely on his ambition to be the governor of the state, and I was happy about it. I was actually relieved to be alone and away from him. I always hated myself for what I had become, but I just couldn't break free. I had locked myself up in a psychological, emotional and physical prison that only I could have destroyed, but I was too weak to save myself. Weak enough to have allowed myself to be used over and over and over again.
I was delivered of a beautiful baby girl on a rainy day in August, and I couldn't be happier. My parents had finally accepted fate that I was better off raising my child out of wedlock. I moved (it's okay to say I ran, because I did) to Ghana to avoid any "accidental" run-ins with Otunba and his family, but mostly to bring up my daughter in peace.
Although life is not perfect, I have learnt to find happiness in my aloneness...


Con amor.

Turning Time #1

It wasn't what I wanted. Not what I bargained for.
All I wanted was to be loved!. I only needed to be appreciated, to be seen as more than a wall gecko, or even worse as a mere shadow trailing behind others. I wanted to be seen as much more than "the politician's mistress".

My name is Tolu and I am a beautiful 26 year old girl, at least that's what I've been told. In my first year at the university, I met a man. A really matured and much older man. When I met him, he wooed me, told me all sort of lies just to get me. I resisted, I was a good girl and dating a man older than my father didn't seem like a good idea. As this sort of stories usually go, I needed help at some point and decided to go to him as he was in the position to render assistance. He did say he loved me didn't he? So I sought him out. I know you think I took advantage of his feelings for me, because I thought so too and I felt terrible for doing it. Otunba helped me as expected, but what my childish mind didn't bank on, was him calling often to also ask me for a favor. A favor for a favor right? God, I was so gullible to have expected otherwise.
It's no excuse, but this is how my relationship with an older man started. I did grant his favour the first time because I felt helpless, like I had no choice. Every other time was just stupidity on my part. He was the second man I got intimate with and I was still as naive as they came. Otunba told me that his wife died two years back and he had been searching for the perfect woman to replace her with. According to him, she gave him only a child- a daughter who was almost 3 years my junior. Imagine being regarded as a stepmother to a girl in the same university as I am. Anyway, I tried to please Otunba in every possible way, while praying and searching for a way out.
Finally, I graduated from the university as the overall best student in my department. Otunba said he was proud, and his own way of showing it was to buy me a brand new SUV to cruise town with. I know I had the option of rejecting the vehicle, but would you?
During my NYSC service year, I met a businessman. He was everything I wanted in a man, everything that Otunba was not. He was young, vibrant, loving, romantic, and he genuinely wanted to make me his wife. Our relationship was beautiful, although complicated. I tried as much as possible to hide each man from the other, and I succeeded. Such that a year after I met David, he popped the question. He proposed to me in a fancy restaurant during dinner. I was overwhelmed and filled to the brim with joy.


.....to be continued.

Con amor