Monday, 13 January 2014

#PLAN B!!!

It's a new year for me, a start-over, a year of endless opportunities... I know you're thinking the statement sounds dumb, but please don't be quick to judge. I know it's a new year for us all and it's an opportunity for each of us to start over, rewrite, or grasp the many chances life is throwing our ways. I can only speak for myself at this moment, and I'm saying "things must be different this year"!!!
Before I go on, I will like to wish you all a happy new year and prosperous 2014. I had the liberty of going to spend Christmas and new year in the UK with my family but after the well wishes and "celebrations", I had more than enough time to reflect on my life and what I want it to be. My very adorable sister (that's always there when I need her) made it particularly fun but eventually I was able to redefine myself. I was able to decide who I didn't want to be, and didn't want to be recognized as. I made it a point to go further and choose the people I'm leaving in 2013, never to be anything more than in the 'past'.
This year,  I have made no resolutions. I have no expectations, and I definitely do not have impossible dreams to be realized. This year started with me being clear-headed and realistic. In the past 3 years (2011, 2012, and 2013), I have noted that I made the same resolutions over and over as the years began and it is quite unfortunate that I didn't get any of them realized. It is not due to my lack of trying (because I DID TRY!), but due to "circumstances and other factors I couldn't possibly recognize as obstacles anymore". I let myself be easily dissuaded by mere feelings- anger, fear, frustration, insecurity, et al. I took my eyes off the prize and saw illusions of impossibility, obstacles!
Five years ago (in my final year at the university), I had dreams and hopes. I thought I knew what I wanted and needed. I assumed and set a goal for myself back then. 5 years.... It will be 5years that I have graduated by December this year, and that in itself is a major wake up call for me.
If I haven't realized any of my resolutions for the past three years and haven't achieved my five year goal till now, then I am definitely doing something wrong. It's time to reshuffle the cards, play the same game but with different rules/different tricks, and win big this time. This year, I'll not worry myself, nor will I stop for any reason. I had a dream, and I think I have let it lie for too long... Five years too long. I'm setting the pace now, and I'm going after what I want for me. Nobody else matters but me... And nobody will get in the way of that!


P.S:
Yesterday's gone, and it's best to leave it be.... This is going to be a constant reminder to myself daily so I stop dwelling I the past. No matter how sweet and rosy the past seem to be in my head today, there was always a bitter side to it. The fact that today isn't full of sunshine doesn't mean there won't be a rainbow in the morning.



LadyAries

1 comment:

  1. Good write up and wonderful speech,keep it up.

    ReplyDelete