Sunday 4 August 2013

Inside a Daddy's girl's head!

I was 'bout 8 when Papa brought her home. She looked so 'beautiful and classy' was the first thought that ran through my mind. She looked like those barbie dolls, but with the shinning black hair on her head. Her waist looks so small from my point of view and so did her entire body. She was so fair, I had to bite my tongue from asking if she was an albino. A boy in my class is almost white like the lady Papa is holding and we all called him 'Oyinbo pepe' until our class teacher taught us a new word to use for him- Albino. Papa came to me and held me close. He then whispered to me "Remember what we talked about last week, that I would give you a new mummy? Well that's your new mummy. Do you like her? Don't you think she looks beautiful?" I nodded as vigorously as my little head could allow and my father smiled. My 'new mummy' came over to join us and she gave me the brightest smile I had ever come across. I kept thinking in my head 'she looks so pretty'. "Hello Tinuke, your Daddy has told me so much about you. He said you're very brilliant", my new mummy was talking now. Her teeth looked just as perfect and white, and I imagined her as a dentist- I chuckled at that, and I guess that gave her the go ahead to continue. "I'm a good girl too, and your Daddy thinks we'll be best of friends. Will you let me be your friend?" She inquired and I simply nodded. I know I should be excited and happy at the prospect of having a mummy but I didn't have a good feeling about her. She was here to separate me from Papa! I just knew it!!
I have my own mummy, but I never met her. Papa tells me how amazing she was and how he loves her even in death and how I remind him so much of her! Yes, my real mummy died while birthing me. I have never had a mummy before, and I never had anyone except Papa. My friend Bolu, told me that her father married a new mummy for her and she doesn't get chocolates from her Daddy again. She said her Daddy stopped loving her when her new mummy started giving birth to babies. I continued to think about everything Bolu told me, and I started to get scared. Bolu thinks my new mummy may start beating me the way hers have started beating her. I was real scared! What if my new mummy starts giving Papa babies? How will I continue to be Papa's best friend? As young as I was, I knew I had to fight for Papa's love. I prayed to God not to give her babies that would compete my Daddy's love with me as Bolu's did.

On my 10th birthday, it seemed that my new mummy was the celebrant. She stole my spotlight, and she was the one sitting beside Papa all day. I was very angry at her, and I cried a lot that night. Already, everything seemed to have changed! My chocolate reserve had reduced drastically, and my food portion too had gone low. She hates me! She makes me do exercises every weekend. Then she went away for about a week, and I was happy. Only problem was, I didn't have Papa back to myself! He went out one day and brought her back with a baby. Oh my God! Bolu was right. Papa didn't stop playing with the baby, and they made it compulsory for me to play with her! Papa stopped buying me chocolates and sweets because mummy told him to, I hated her for taking my Daddy away from me.
11years have gone by, and I've spent 6years away from home. I'm graduating and Daddy is here, along with the family. I got over being Daddy's girl ages ago, and I think I grew up. I just don't think I ever found a way to forgive mummy, probably because I didn't understand her story. I did grow up to be a petite lady, thanks to the weekend exercises, and I have a kid brother now. Today though, I was surprised by how much effort mummy put in planning me a graduation party. She was so proud of me, that my friends all commented that I'm lucky. She walked with her head up high, and beamed with joy. She looks older now, but as stunning as ever and she made sure everything was perfect for my party. My younger ones stood by the sidelines unsure if to join the party or not, and this broke my heart. Could I have been so wrong? Could I have been blinded by my love for Daddy that I didn't realise the kids needed love as well? Could I have wanted to hold on to my Daddy so much that I failed to see what a jewel my mummy is?
I took my younger ones into the party and fed them cakes, kissed them heartily and took pictures with them. Then I went in search of mummy, and awarded her with a big hug. A silent plea, I guess but it felt good. I may have had an amazing mother I never knew, but Daddy brought me an awesome mummy that day 13years ago and if I could turn back time, I would have enjoyed every minute with her. I shouldn't have listened to Bolu so much, she was wrong. My new mummy is the best!...



Con amor

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